back to school for me.

Upon reviewing my blog, I realized I spelled "socially acceptable" wrong. I said "socially exceptable." That's not even a word. And I'm embarrassed. But I fixed it. Please keep reading my blog even though I've let you down, grammatically.

Why Celine Dion is awesome

I couldn't agree more.

Like Anne Geddes, but better...

Halloween is upon us, and it is my favorite holiday, narrowly beating St. Patrick's Day. October means fall weather (except in Florida) and it's the season for my birthday (happy birthday, erin) Usually, I'm planning my halloween costume in July. I get that excited. I've come to realize that baby costumes are by far much funnier than adult costumes, and I've sought out my favorites this year:


First of all, isn't "freshner" spelled wrong? Second of all, this is funny because babies frequently smell bad.

Food products are ALWAYS a good halloween costume. And I warmly appreciate this kid's commitment to acting terrified of being boiled. Bravo.

Okay, now I know it's socially acceptable to baby talk to children about how they're so cute, you could just eat them up, but this is taking it a bit far.

See above.

And this one tops my list. I'm at a loss to understand the pairing of aliens to chickens, but a.) good job, mom and dad for the lifelike effects. James Cameron would be proud. And b.) all i ask is that my kids someday can make this same face. confusion? terror? dirty diaper? ...all of the above.

Happy Halloween!

P.S. I found a picture of a toddler in a Hitler costume that was wildly inappropriate. As much as I wanted other people to see that picture, Hitler does not belong on my blog...unless I'm talking about Apples to Apples.

Gratitude

I'm adopting a new routine of taking time to show gratitude to things that put my favorite colors into my life. Here's my first edition:

Dear Baby Jesus, thank your for Starbucks and the warm fuzzy feeling in my tummy as well as the enerygy burst. I know that you love Starbucks, too, because you put one on every street corner in America...or is that the work of the devil?...

Dear Baby Jesus, thank you for Henry Cavill. What a beautiful creation of suave and brawn chiseled from chinchilla fur and Arctic steel. If I told you what I'd like him to do to me, you might kill a kitten.

Dear Baby Jesus, thank you for Spiced Pumpkin candles from Yankee Candle. If I could, I would eat it with a spoon.

Dear Baby Jesus, thank you for BodyFlow classes at the gym, or should I say GypsyFlow. It's like being a yogi in a Van Gogh painting only much sweatier.

Caution Deaf Child

So there's a sign on Big Bend in Webster Groves down the street from Webster University, my alma mater (go gorlocks), that reads "Caution Deaf Child." At first glance, the driver would think "Okay, some kid with a hearing disability can't hear me driving by and for whatever reason is prone to playing very close to the street where I could hit him or her." Upon further brainstorming, I've decided that this sign does not specify who indeed is in danger. Is it that the driver is endangering the kid? Or is the driver in danger of being attacked by a VICIOUS CHILD THAT IS INCAPABLE OF HEARING YOUR SCREAMS OF HORROR!!!???!? ...Just a thought.

Memoirs...

Memoirs is the word I'm gonna use. Memoirs of hilarity.

Why, oh why, can't I?

This is my first blog. Considering the vast popularity of blogs, one would assume maybe I just didn't have anything to say to share with the rest of the world. Oh, contrare, my viewing friend. I've come to realize that there's a lot going on in the ol' skull here that I would like to let loose on the internet community, if not the world (could be the same thing). Anyhooters, I'm not one to explode my opinions on everyone else. That's not my style. My favorite way of opening the eyes of those around me is pointing out hilarity in everyday life. So I'd like to think of this blog as my journal of hilarity....maybe journal isn't good because I've never actually finished a journal, just collaged the covers.... and i don't like the word "diary"... I'm gonna go with blog... until I can think of a better word.